Confessions of a Sex Witch

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I'm Jade Scarfone.
A digital strategist and transformation catalyst, merging a decade of corporate systems mastery with a profound journey of self-discovery. From navigating the high-stakes world of banking to making waves in high-ticket affiliate marketing, I'm now dedicated to empowering entrepreneurs through strategic digital innovations. 

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How I stumbled into a world of temples and magick…

My witch friends and I at our recent content orgy

These are the confessions of a sex witch.

So, a few months ago, I wrote a piece about how my friends thought I was coming to join a sex cult. It was partly a joke but also pretty true. I had intended to chronicle all the events since moving to the Northern Rivers, Australia. But let’s just say life got really interesting, and blogging about my experiences kind of fell away.

Until I spent the week in a castle creating content with some of my favorite witches and wizards, friends, lovers, colleagues, and artists… the lines are a little blurred these days. We coined it a ‘content orgy’ — a group of different photographers, videographers, and embodied creatives coming together to do a whole bunch of magick and ritual and turn it into art aka content.

It was partly marketing for a program one of my friends/clients is about to start promoting and creating a video clip for one of his upcoming music releases. It was mostly a cool reason to get a bunch of our friends together in an epic location and make erotic/ritualistic art. It’s something we intend to do quite regularly, and it’ll keep growing.

As I reflected on everything we captured throughout the week, I realized people need a glimpse into this magical world we live in.

What’s so normal to us, is so on the fringes for most of society, and I want to bridge those worlds. I want to break the stigma around sexuality and ritual. I want to share my stories, so people who are feeling curious can start to find their own way into this world if they’re feeling called.

After all, it’s enriched my life so much.

So, what have I been up to these last few months?

Sex Magick and Priestessing

Back in February, amidst the worst floods our area has seen, we started running an online container. It was called Obsidian and was about facing your deepest, darkest shadows. Ironic that it began at this time while our external world faced so much darkness, and we live on obsidian land.

The program had to be postponed as we navigated internet failures, people losing their homes, etc. My friend who was facilitating the container had no internet at home, and his office had been flooded. I was living up the hill from him, had started working in his team, and my internet was working fine, so before I knew it, my house became the temple for our weekly sex magick rituals.

One month into living here, my house suddenly turned into a church of sex. I became one of the priestesses holding space for the container each week. And I definitely wasn’t mad about it. Ok, before you go and picture all these wild scenarios, let me clear things up…

When we say sex magick in this instance, we’re talking about guided self-pleasure rituals. We had three of us in person in the space, and everyone else was tuning in via Zoom. We gathered like this twice a day on Sundays for eight weeks (in a container that was only meant to run for six 😂), and the magick that was unfolding for all of us was incredible.

For the final ritual, we ended up with a few more of us at my friend’s place, and once the call ended, we had our own very wild, raunchy, erotic ritual. This one you can let your imagination run wild with. The next morning we woke up to over 100 sales for our next program. So you could say that was my first taste of real sex magick, and I loved what I was experiencing.

International School of Temple Arts

Not too long after that, I attended Level 1 of ISTA here in the Northern Rivers. Nestled in a beautiful forest sanctuary, surrounded by beautiful cascading waters and lush mountains. One hundred of us, including many of my friends and co-workers, gathered to work through our sexual shadows.

Most of the people I knew there were part of the facilitation team and had been telling me about how being in these spaces had had such a profound impact on their lives. So I was excited to go and experience it for myself.

We learned about things like boundaries and consent, effective communication, somatic processing, and archetypal work. Then the real fun began. We got to put what we were learning into practice at our temple nights. And throughout our daily rituals. I won’t share about the rituals because it’s something you have to go and experience for yourself. But I will share that the feeling of freedom and deep connection to self and others was palpable.

It was a huge initiation experience for me as I came deeper into myself. For me, it wasn’t about sex but the connection with myself. And while I witnessed a lot of people relating with one another, I was working through a lot of my own pieces. At times I felt the inner judgment, why can’t I just let go and connect with other people sexually?! But it didn’t feel true for me, and I honored that.

I’m constantly surprised by how I can feel such deep levels of intimacy and love with people without needing to have sex with them. I mean, obviously, I still have desires. I’m not trying to be the Virgin Mary here. But also not letting just anyone in like I used to when I was younger. It feels much more important to create safety, intimacy, and depth these days.

Side note: That’s the other ironic thing about where I live and what people think about our lifestyle. To outsiders, it seems like all we do is have lots of wild sex, but really most of the time it’s inner/solo work in co-created spaces. When I tell people about our self-pleasure/sex magick rituals they automatically assume it’s just a bunch of people masturbating or having giant orgies. Still, it’s so much deeper than that. I’ve had my mum call me a slut, which is hilarious because when I was living under her roof I actually was having way more sex with all different people. And now I’m having less sex than ever, but feel most turned on and connected to my eros, pleasure, and purpose than ever.

Temple Nights

Temple Nights are based on ancient Tantric traditions of gathering in sacred spaces to celebrate and worship love, the heart space, our sensuality, one another, and our connection to the divine. It is where we unite, within and without.

We have dance temples, theatre temples, void temples, women’s temples, and erotic temples.

Everything we do here has a ceremonial and ritualistic approach. Parties aren’t just a bunch of people getting messed up. There’s intention weaved through everything.

I’ve attended birthday parties where the theme was spiritual debauchery. A divorce party. Halloween rituals. Solstice parties. On the majority of these occasions, we’ve dabbled with various substances, but we’ve sat in circles, set intentions, and all journeyed with the medicines together. It’s beautiful.

There was a Christmas solstice party at the end of 2021 where we had free reign to take our anger out on selected Covid marshalls (basically our friends who volunteered as tributes). After a year of lockdowns and restrictions, there was a lot thrown at them. Contact dance nights and underground parties that kept us all together when the world was trying to keep us apart.

We’ve used these spaces to work through some pretty heavy times. And these spaces have helped me to form bonds deeper than anything I’ve ever experienced.

Queer Culture

This is the first place where I’ve felt safe exploring my queerness. We have a beautiful queer community.

I’m still very new to this space, and it’s been so nice to be welcomed with open arms. For people to assure me there’s no such thing as not queer enough. That if I resonate, it’s true.

I’ve had beautiful erotic experiences with women. Something I’ve always been curious about but was always way too afraid to delve into. But here, it’s so common. Pretty much everyone I know is queer. It’s so refreshing to be in such an open and loving space where everything is welcome. Where we don’t run and hide from the taboo, where we’re not afraid to dive into our shadows together.

Especially with my Catholic upbringing. I remember as a teenager, I used to tell my nonna I was a lesbian, and she would look at me in horror and basically say she’d disown me if I ever did that.

Dakini training and parlor work

Earlier this year, I moved in with a friend who was working at an erotic massage parlor. My curiosity got the better of me, and after spending a year working for a sexuality school, it seemed like a natural next step for me to try this out too.

As with everything else I’ve dived into since being in this community, this brought up a lot of old conditioning. All the stories around this kind of work, feeling like I was doing something wrong and dirty, etc.

Then the floods hit, I lost my car, and I convinced myself maybe the work wasn’t for me.

Then a few months later, I spent a week nestled in another friend’s forest home with ten other women. We cooked meals together, basked naked in the sun, went for hikes, and spent cute movie and sauna nights together.

Amidst all this cuteness, we also did a LOT of deep shadow work. Healing sister wounds, archetypal work, and existential kink while learning how to bring the work of the dakini into the world.

We dreamed up plans for running a conscious dakini parlor together.

What’s a dakini, you may be wondering?

As Khandro Rinpoche, whose very name literally means “precious dakini,” points out: “Traditionally, the term dakini has been used for outstanding female practitioners, consorts of great masters, and to denote the enlightened female principle of nonduality which transcends gender.” Khandro Rinpoche defines the authentic dakini principle as “a very sharp, brilliant wisdom mind that is uncompromising, honest, with a little bit of wrath.” This, to me, is a very exact description of the qualities of the teachers who are featured in this book. Despite their gentleness and humor, I experience many of the female teachers as direct, sharply intelligent, radical, and courageous.
You can learn more here: http://www.dakinipower.com/what-is-a-dakini

After completing the training, I felt called to reignite my work at the parlor. I don’t work there often as my online business is my priority, but every now and then, I go in and do a shift. The more I go, the more I realize how sacred and beautiful this work is. How healing.

And how necessary it is. I have had many profound experiences in that space. It’s no longer me in that room, I go to a transpersonal space, channeling my Isis and Magdalene lineage. I’ve had men cry in my arms. I’ve had them share some of their deepest secrets. I’ve also had them cross my boundaries. It’s not just a powerful healing space for them but a potent learning ground for me.

Never did I think I’d end up in this field of work. I used to hold so much judgment for the people that entered these spaces. Now I have nothing but love and compassion. I’ve come to see it through a whole new lens, and I wish to share these stories so more people can come to understand how important this work is.

Communing with the stars

In case you didn’t guess, astrology is also a big thing in these circles. And recently, I received a deeper reading of my natal chart, including various asteroid placements. We focused on what I’m here to do and my creative signature. A few things that stood out…

I have a lot of Scorpio energy. *surprise, surprise* My soul’s evolution is tied to sexuality and the occult. Clearly, that’s super present in the various teams and social circles I’ve found my way into over the last few years. And weaves into my work in many ways. I’m not necessarily here to teach this stuff, but through deepening my knowledge and embodiment in these areas, it naturally becomes part of my transmission.

I’m designed to do something on the public stage and communicate in a way that’s artistic, expansive, philosophical, and spiritual. And involves travel. There’s a lot of depth, mysticism, and elusiveness to me. I’m here to intuit, attune, feel deeply and be sensitive.

What am I in devotion to? Teaching systems and structures in a way that’s dark fem in essence. (which kind of makes total sense as I’ve recently launched an offering for Tech Witches)

I can feel there are so many women on the precipice, just waiting for me to launch this offer. There’s already a long waitlist of business owners ready to hire tech witches as soon as they’re ready to go. Yet somehow, I’m paralyzed on getting an offer out.

I’m afraid of my own power.

Once I do put this out, there’s no going back.

I can’t hide in the shadows anymore. I can’t ride on the coattails of everyone else’s businesses I’ve been supporting.

I have to become a leader myself. I have to commit. So I’m being forced to face all my avoidant tendencies. To clear things that have been weighing in the background.

To take more action than I have in a long time.

To make space for this expansion that’s already happening.

And it’s exciting because I get to marry all my worlds together. Sex, magick, embodiment, entrepreneurship, corporate. I feel myself being somewhat of a bridge between them. Guiding people to their true paths.

What else lies in store for this Sex Witch?

Who can say? I’m married to the mystery. I never imagined half the stuff I’ve done this year would happen to me. Yet here we are.

My primary work is my online work. I am an entrepreneur at heart, and I’m feeling more and more drawn to immerse myself back in that world. I’m feeling called to move back to Bali soon and then travel to Europe.

But there’s something about this part of the world that has me captivated. I haven’t experienced anything like this anywhere else, and all those who have left have reflected the same. There’s something very special about this land and the constellation of people that are drawn here.

Somehow I stumbled into this world of sex, magick, temples, and art. It feels like I’ve walked into an ancient world. Something beyond the veil. Like in some of the fantasy films where you cross through a portal and enter some mystical realm. I’m not sure it’s something I’ll ever find anywhere else. So this place and these people are etched in my heart. I’ve found a home in each of them and feel like we’ll always be weaving in and out of each other’s lives.

We often say we live in a bubble. And when anyone leaves the Northern Rivers to go to other parts of Australia or into the wider world, we remember how things that are so normal to us here are so not normal to most people.

Dancing naked on beaches, big sighs, and conscious breaths, crying in public. All of this gets you some weird looks out in the real world. Yet that’s not even skimming the surface of what we get up to here.

We also often joke that we should have a reality show. If they made Byron Baes about us, instead of some fake influencer trash that doesn’t even represent any of the truth about this region, then that would be some quality tv. But alas, the world doesn’t seem ready for that. So we trust that our magick is rippling out and having an impact in more subtle ways.

We trust in the mystery.

Confessions of a Sex Witch

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